2013 In Review (Too Much Drama)

Well it's that time again when I reflect on the happenings of the previous year.  This year it's mostly about my personal drama.  2013 was full of incredible highs and devastating lows.  This seemed to be the year of reconnecting with family.  I also met, for the first time, three new step grandchildren.  What a blessing!  On the downside, I dealt with a lot of jealousy that took it's toll.

March was a particularly good month.  I was officially on a break from all cancer treatment.  Yippee! I got to see my stepdaughter and stepson, who I hadn't seen in 12 yrs.  It was then that I met Carmen, my two year old step granddaughter.  Against all odds, I became a dog owner again, taking possession of my stepdaughter's dog, Bruce.  

On the flip side, the cancer treatment sent me immediately into menopause, which to date is one of the worst things I've ever had to deal with.  I'm happy to report the worst of it is over.  Now I only have the occasional hot flash.

My stepdaughter and her daughter. Both are named Carmen.

Brucey, Brucey.

This year my doll play was a little less than previous years as I spent lots of time with my boyfriend, Calvin and Bruce.  Speaking of Calvin, we celebrated our one year anniversary in July, 2013.  Would you believe we broke up the same month.  Yeah.  It was sad, because he's such a great guy.  It wasn't a bad break up, so we are still friends.  

And this brings us to August.  From this point on is where most of the drama begins.  You guys know I'm not one for a lot of drama.  That's why my doll stories are somewhat tame.  But let the real life drama begin.  At the insistence of my ex-boyfriend, Wes (Tyler's dad), I had dinner with him.  This led to us giving our relationship another go.  We first dated in 2002 - 2004, when Tyler was 4 yrs old.  Tyler and his sister lived with their dad.  Their mom, who worked at night, lived a few miles away.  During those two years, the mom and I had our ups and downs.  This is where I confess that my character Melanie, is derived from the kid's mother.  No, her name is not Melanie.  As hard as I tried to get along with her, at the time, she made my life very difficult.  After the break up, she and I were more cordial, and she always introduced me as, "Tyler's second mom".  In 2009, after I got diagnosed, she was really there for me, encouraging me to hang on so that I could see Tyler play in the NBA.  So over the years, when Wes would try to get us back together, I would retreat.  Just the thought of dealing with "Melanie" again was enough for me to say no.  But a miracle happened.  "Melanie" got married this past summer.  So, I finally said I would give the relationship another try, thinking that as a newlywed, she would be too caught up in her own bliss to care about us.

Wes and I, August 2013

Around this same time is when I met another step granddaughter, Angelica, 14.  Oh my!  She and I hit it off like we had known each other forever.  It was agape love at first sight.  She was living with my ex-husband and he wanted me to spend Saturdays with her.  I was more than happy to do so.  She was so much fun and we had a lot in common. 

Angelica

One of the many passions we share is the love of animals.  And this brings me to Buttercup, my miniature Jack Russell terrier.  I met Buttercup in September and became aware that she was not being properly cared for.  After a few sleepless nights worrying about her, I decided to take action.  I rescued her, with the intent of finding her a new home.  I did not want to take on another dog, but as luck would have it, she fit in perfectly, and I decided to keep her.  As you are all aware, she gave birth to four puppies, 8 weeks ago.  More drama, as I didn't know she was pregnant until she began giving birth while in my arms.  So things seemed to be going well.  Angelica and I are having a great time.  I'm devoting my weekends to her, helping her with her school work, and exposing her to different activities.  I'm also spending time with Tyler, during the week.  So I'm a happy camper.

Angelica, myself, and Tyler

 Insert drama here.  Sometime in October, my ex-husband decides he no longer wants me to see Angelica.  He doesn't give a great reason, except that he needs to protect her from me.  She and I are both devastated.  Bottom line, my ex-husband became jealous of the friendship she and I had developed.  She had started asking to spend more time with me, and he couldn't handle it.  I was heart broken, but I respected his wishes.  She and I would speak on the phone when we could and I told her that our separation wouldn't be forever.

So I continued working with Tyler, in the meantime, trying to help him with his school work.  His dad decided to move to get Tyler into another school.  Luckily for us, this school actually allowed kids to have textbooks.  Imagine that.  So I was asked to tutor Tyler two days a week.  It was a little difficult at first because his basketball practice schedule was all over the place.  But I would accommodate the late hours and change the tutoring time to fit the practice schedule.  Still difficult, but I was committed to helping him improve his grades.

Me and Tyler headed to a function for his sister, Tyeshaa

Tyeshaa

Insert drama here.  All of a sudden, "Melanie" starts intentionally picking Tyler up from practice on the days he is supposed to have tutoring, and taking him to her house. As it turns out, she doesn't want me to tutor him.  This the woman who will ask me to take her son food after school, because he's hungry.  This the woman who will call and ask me to take him to school if she can't make it to his dad's house in time.  This the woman who introduces me as his second mom.  This the woman who has had me to her house and fed me.  But you don't want me to help him get better grades?  You have someone who is tutoring your son for free, and adjusting her schedule around his schedule, but you would rather he fail.  

Below is a picture of me and Tyler's mom at a function we attended in early November.  This would be the equivalent of Danielle and Melanie taking a picture together.  As you can see, we are very friendly to each other, and I was considering her a friend.  She even introduced me as "Wes' future wife"  at this function.

Me (bad hair day) and "Melanie", Tyler's mom.

Needless to say, I was stressed out!  Between my ex-husband and "Melanie", I really felt like I was losing my mind.  How can someone, who is trying to give of her time and resources to help others, be treated so poorly?  Well, as I mentioned in my opening, this was all taking a toll on me.  My cancer numbers, that had been stable since March, started taking a turn for the worst in October.  Soooo, I'll be going back into treatment next month.  Yep, that really sucks.  

So how did it all end up?  Angelica moved back up to New York to live with her mom.  She and I spent two weeks together before she left.  We talk every other day.  She is due to come visit me this summer for a few weeks.

My ex-husband and I are no longer friends.  Nor are we speaking.  

I still tutor Tyler, but there are no set days.  I now work around his basketball schedule and his mother's issues.  I wanted to quit the job, but after he got a B on his last test, his dad wouldn't let me quit.  Without my help he got a 35 on his test.  With my help he got an 80 on the retest.  I guess you can't argue with results.

"Melanie" and I have not spoken to each other for about a month now.  She did however, ask me, through Tyler, if I could drive him to school since she wouldn't make it to his house in time.  Odd that she asked me, since his dad was there, too.  Drama.

I am thrilled that I got to reconnect with so many family members.  Even though they aren't blood relatives, I love them just as much.  

In 2014, I hope to keep reconnecting with family without all the drama.  I will continue doing doll stories.  Some may even have some drama involved.  I will continue cooking and baking in real life and in doll life.  We may see some more doll couples get married.  I have set a date of summer of 2015 for my own wedding.  I don't know who the groom will be just yet, but I'm putting it out in the atmosphere and seeing what happens.  Thanks for all the continued support.  I still enjoy reading your comments, and reading your blogs.  In this new year, I will probably have three days out of every week that I catch up on blog reading.  I'm looking forward to sharing more dolly stuff with you this year.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!